The following article was taken from Puttylike, contents belongs to them.
Worrying About What Others Think is the Killer
Have you noticed that you have no trouble opening up with close friends? That’s because you know them well and you aren’t sitting there, worrying about what they think of you (it’s ironic, we tend to worry more about what strangers think of us, than close friends).
But with new people, you worry about the impression you’re making. You’re not sure if the person is going to judge you or accept you, and so the instinct is to protect yourself by not revealing too much, not allowing yourself to be too vulnerable.
Talk About Things that are Meaningful to You
This is the key. Talk about meaningful topics. It could be work, relationships or experiences. It doesn’t matter, as long as it’s something that you care about and can speak about with emotion. Don’t bring up the weather (I cringe every time the weather comes up in conversation), unless it’s a relevant detail in the story of the amazing hike you just took.
If you talk about meaningful topics first and allow yourself to express the feelings associated with those topics, the other person will feel something too. They will then be more likely to open up themselves.
We All Want to Connect with Other People, We Just Need to Feel Safe First
When you fight the urge to protect yourself and open up about what’s important to you instead, other people will want to as well. Even if they can’t connect to the specific details in your story, they’ll feel the emotion behind it. The emotion is what will stick with them and make them want to share too.
For the full article, read How to Break Through Small Talk and Turn Strangers into Friends
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